why I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook

We walked around the streets like we had a purpose, our clothes, as far from last year's compulsory uniform as we could get, made us feel above everything. We weren't students but we felt young. We did not have money, that was no problem. We pushed and tumbled.

We went from sushi bars to little alleys, walking around with a grin. We drank out of cold glass lemonade bottles like we thought cool people drank out of beer bottles. We looked in comfortable silence, now and then understanding that we meant something to each other. It was hot, our singlets stuck to us, our teeth shone. We found a park, sat down. We didn't speak about anything really, but we spoke about everything. And the sky was covered with an ugly green cover, covering the playground. Covering the kids for whom the playground was built for from the Australian rays. But it was just us.

We took pictures trying to crystallise the moment. A red slide as back-drop. One would become our profile picture. One would get 35 likes. At home, sitting on my un-made bed - I should probably be writing my oral. That day was worth more than 35 likes. That day shouldn't have ended with me sitting down on my bed, on my phone, waiting.

It was two months ago now, no boy "took" me. But I took myself. I arrived with a group of girls (that's all they were to me) at the formal. Girls were shaking, some were gorgeous others caked. Hugging, and pointing and complementing. The night, which happened to be my sixteenth birthday too, was a blur. The dancing was crazy, the food was expensive but the chicken stringy, the view magnificent.

I felt magnificent. I wore heels for the first time, and streamed in and out in and out of crowds. It felt like after all these years, everyone was at peace. Cliques somewhat melted away, and all we could hear was screaming, and feet (manicure $30). There were strands of hair flying (hair-do $40) and girls ripping out their clips (MYER $23), and hiking up their dress (Tigerlily, $300) and coming together. Walking out, I felt euphoric, I felt alive. I had walked in uncertain and nervous and had been spat out a woman.

There were many pictures of that night. Girls who had spent hundreds but who had looked gloomy on the night, looked ravishing in the pictures. Their makeup was flawless and they shined positivity, I didn't appear in many pictures from that night. After weeks of this I couldn't help but wonder: had I been there at all?

art project: fashion photography with strangers

For my major art piece at school I explored fashion photography, with a focus on feminism and sub-focus on strangers and teenagerhood. I approached three very different girls in the year below me that I had never met before that had original fashion tastes, and most importantly did not fall into the stereotypes set by society of being beautiful. Instead of picking someone I knew to model for me, I also wanted to experiment with the relation between a group of strangers. This project was all about pushing oneself out of one's comfort zone in order to create art. For the shoot, I asked the girls to chose outfits that they felt beautiful in but that were different, sometimes even seen as "un-cool" by society.

The girls had very different hair, skin and body types but all three of them looked very self-assured in the shoots, reinforcing the theme I chose to convey through my pictures. I really like the fact that the pictures I took are very moody and depict adolescence as a super complicated yet quirky ride.

Through the couple of hours of shooting, I became to understand the girls' tastes and personality. I uncovered something that I find very rarely in fashion photography, but that is reflected in all of the artists' work that has inspired me: a piece of authenticity. As well as this, through this project I have been able to understand that feminism is not about killing every man in sight or wearing no bra, it's about women expressing themselves. And that's exactly what I was able to do.

the forgotten frames

happy thursday!
- lm

a picture tells 1000 words and all that jazz

So over christmas i received my first phone & though nothing beats the sound of the shutter and weight of my nikon d3100 as not the mention the quality of the pictures it takes, there's definitely something to say about being able to take pictures at any time with a phone that just slips into your pocket.
I've decided to share some of the pictures i've taken and the stories behind them.

This is a screenshot of a pep-talk/poem thing that I read on susannacole.tumblr.com that really hit home. Especially the "What are you doing right now, that makes you excited to wake up each morning, even Mondays, that paints a smile on your lips?".

I fell upon this statue near the gym I do martial arts at, surrounded by a gate. Though I don't believe in a God per se, and this figure is obviously religious, I really loved how the light was falling on it and how it looked as if it could turn and look at me at any minute.

This is one of my favourite pictures of all time, we were coming home from a hike, and it was really really hot and arid. I remember the feeling of an open window and hot wind coming into the car, but my sister and I didn't really mind. This was definitely a moment of freedom.

This is a picture I don't really remember taking of my bedside table, this little dude holds my glasses every night and you can just see the shadow of the journal I keep by my bed in case inspiration hits me when I'm dozing off.

This is a picture of my mum driving us to the mall, it was the beginning of summer, and I was really getting along her as well as my little sister, and I felt like anything was possible. I also remember the very heavy and hot feeling in the air, and the smell of smoke, almost suffocating.

This is my school backpack I bought in Switzerland, when I went there for just a day. I love how it is exactly the same colour of this pine-corn-thing in this picture. At my school, since we have a uniform, backpacks are a big thing, and represent how you 'fit' in. The surf ones are the coolest and then progressively you have the more school-appropriate ones for the "less in fashion" kids. It's all pretty silly, but I like how no-one has the same pack as me.

This was also during the summer break, when my friend Lydia and I went to the pool and basically pigged out on food. She brought hummus, chips, cookies and thin bread, and I brought turkish pizza and dessert. It wasn't healthy but boy was it yum.

When driving to the coast house we were renting, we came across the 'Tree of Lost Souls' in the middle of greenery. In Aussie land greenery is rare, but I guess lost souls are even rarer.

This is a picture my mum took of me, once we had completed a 3 hour intensive trek, that consisted in different stages. The last one was a series of steep ladders and as I am slightly scared of heights it was a bit of an ordeal for me (look how hard I'm gripping that ladder). The scenery was stunning and made it worth it though.

This a picture of a little shrine I have in my room: you can see candles, my favourite magazine: yen, my Indian elephant and an unfinished collage.

This is a picture I took of my friend's room when I was over for a sleepover. She put a fabric on her walls to make this really cool spotty effect. I went there so we could work on a group project but we ended up just drinking tea and swooning over the Brittish guy from 'The Boat that Rocked'.

and this is your life.

My biggest fear in the world into one quote...

“One day, you’re 17 and you’re planning for someday. And then quietly, without you ever really noticing, someday is today. And then someday is yesterday. And this is your life.” 

- John Green

light tricks, life tricks

listening to shake it up by florence and the machine (well, anything from florence and the machine really) and admiring lisa mitchell's music video, coin laundry, that you can find here.

just playing with light, just trying to write.
just trying to capture the little moments
and trying to push away the big ones.
(i.e. college, the future and other such things)

have a nice week,

and a belated happy halloween to all.

xx

lotus marina.

bless this mess

x listen (album :: "bless this mess", by lisa mitchell) x

the end of winter break ...

things I will miss

+ bubble-blowing in the garden

+ lazing around, doing not much at all

+ borrowing music from the library (yeah, I didn't know that was possible either!) such as lisa mitchell's beautiful album: bless this mess. / link above

+ grey skies, overcast weather giving me an excuse to read in the warmth

+ little every day adventures

+ the non-drama of the holidays (I'm not looking forward to the rush-rush-rush-no-don't-look-up-from-your-studies-to-enjoy-life-sorry-that's-not-tolerated)

+ going to the cinemas in the morning, as opposed to during nighttime - just because

+ impromptu baking or cooking at any hour

things I'm looking forward to

ok. no, guys I'm determined to make this work, positive attitude.

+ the new teachers, the new school-year. I'm also looking forward to the all the new things I'm going to learn and the new approaches I'll take.

What about you? What have been the highlights of your break?

Have a lovely weekend, friends.

xo

lts m

quiet

“T h e  q u i e t e r  y o u  b e c o m e ,  t h e  m o r e  y o u  c a n  h e a r. ” 

BABA RAM DAS

today was such a quiet day.

i drank white tea.

i munched on cashew nuts.

i sat outside in the winter air.

a lot of thoughts went through my mind, i tried to write them down as poems.

i pondered the meaning of life.

i played around with double exposures.

and i read the great gatsby.

today was a quiet day and i somehow feel much more peaceful than when i woke up this 

morning.

x

lotus m.

(oh and thank you for your encouraging comments on the launching of 'there is always a 

story'! i was very happy when i read all of them.)

there is always a story | a project

I'm so excited to announce the beginning of a project (you know how I am with projects, I cannot seem to stick to one, and go about scribbling, doodling, scheming until, pop, another idea for a project comes to mind)!

I love photography. I've learnt that just because you have a fancy shmancy Nikon D3100 (incidentally called 'Iris') doesn't mean your photos are more valuable or 'better'. Through the lens I slip into an observer. I shed my extrovert personality for a couple of minutes, or even hours, and observe. I look at how the light falls on my subject, how their shadow mingles with other dark shapes, the many different way I could capture the moment or the story (this doesn't mean that sometimes I just kind of snap away maniacally hoping to get at least one nice-ish photo).

Poetry is also a major part of my life. I call myself a poet, but really, I'm just a girl running around with a notebook and pen trying to convey her thoughts about the world around her in decent words. It usually isn't a success, but yes, I do love reading (and writing) poetry.

This project will combine my poems and photography to tell a story... a double experience.

Please have a look at the 'there is always a story' project here (it's super bare at the moment so let's not expect wonders right away), and feel free to tag along either by:

1. following it on tumblr
2. shooting me an email or a comment sharing any links or words to inspire me on this year long journey (I'm going to need all the inspiration I can get)
3. learning more about it on the 'about the project' tab
4. 'reblogging' or 'hearting' my creations
5. or by sharing it to your readers (I'd be so grateful!)

'there is always a story' has barely been launched but I'd like it to grow as a community project involving all those photography and poetry lovers out there who have their own stories to tell (it will involve some interviews and other surprises).

Stay tuned,

(You guys are awesome by the way!xo)

lotus m.

a blackout in the middle of winter.

  

“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” ― Eleanor Roosevelt 

At first, when night slowly fell, and we had absolutely no electricity, and it was the middle of winter, we were a little panicky. But after bringing out the candles, we brought out our books and our knitting and spent a couple of hours 'the-old-fashioned-way".

It was definitely an adventure, but I must say we were glad to have electricity back after a couple of hours of straining our eyes to read and bumping into things on our way to the toilet.

Have a lovely weekend folks (hopefully with one or two adventures, they're always good fun)
-lm

P-S I've finished all my exams and received my results. I am so happy my hard work has paid off and that I can relax (if only for a handful of weeks). I must say I feel empty without always having something to do...

P-P-S Yesterday was my first full-on party, and oh my, it was amazing. A post about the night will be coming soon, so stay tuned!